Showing posts from September, 2018


I decided after 3 years of "taking a break," in a doctoral program in Human Services with Walden to head on back to class. My first class is Qualitative Reasoning and Analysis. It is hairy, and difficult and - it is all online. With this in mind, my 19 year old daughter is in boot camp with a fractured hip, telling me, "Only 20% of the people make it through boot camp with this injury." I told her, "but that is not true for you." All the while, as I write this; I failed my first assignment in the course. I considered the fact that many people don't make it through the program. I got in my head about how, "I don't need that degree," and I second guessed myself that this going back was all a big mistake. You know, the usual. After a day of marinating in the illusions. I began to deal with the truth. It's just a paper. It's not the end of the world. Nothing is - ever. We don't really know the rest of the story. I decided to stop

I told my son, "Screw you."

I generally do not nit pick my children. I allow them to live, and move and have their being, and when they need me - I am always here for them. Even with their homework! If it doesn't get done, they fail. I learned that it is okay to allow kids to live with their mistakes. I get involved to correct them, not to punish them. The only time I boldly step in, in when they are unloving. My 16 year old son is a red headed boy, that I have gone rounds with...till one day when he was about 5 years old - I said, "I'm gonna stomp off your freckles," and we both laughed. That was it. It was over. I stopped the resistance to my parenting, and made it about his life. When I did not care about the perception, but more about the real mother and son relationship, things changed. To this day, after giving me lots of grey hair that I cover often, he is in Modeling United Nations (MUN) with his school, honors classes, football, wrestling, and into girls, oh - and rap. He doesn't